Some random things that have made me laugh recently.
One of my residents is given to rather odd, often vulgar, but usually hilarious phrases. Some of his latest gems include:
"They" and "them" are spirits of darkness. When someone tells you "they" all do it, run the other way.
Don't give him heparin, ambulate the motherf@#%&r.
Giving this guy predisone is Kosher as Christmas.
Overheard in the waiting room, from a very obviously newly married couple:
"Kix? You put sugar on your Kix?! I thought I knew you!"